Want a Fresh Start? Release Your Past!

personal growth Aug 24, 2021

Looking for something fresh to get you out of the same-old routines?


Are you trying to think positive and find the silver lining this past year?


Maybe you’re determined to put it in positive terms, so you create a Reframe.


Our definition of a Reframe is: 

“when we consciously recognize and acknowledge negative thinking in ourselves, and then create positive options and solutions to counter the negative thinking.” 


That’s a good thing, right? 


Reframing is usually seen when someone displays a positive attitude as they face challenging times or a difficult situation. 


Conscious Reframes are a positive first step in dealing with personal challenges. These new positive thoughts are what most people consider to be an effective Mindset Shift.


However, as positive and well intentioned as they may be, the weakness in conscious reframes is that they don’t resolve the unconscious blocks that are interfering with the conscious goal. 


In short, the conscious and unconscious are out of alignment.


And therefore, the Mindset Shift may be only temporary.


You’ve probably already experienced a temporary Mindset Shift. 

You got really excited about a new goal. You focused and worked hard at achieving it. Maybe it was a goal to lose weight, or increase your finances, or maybe to improve your relationships. 


You keep trying. Maybe your friends give you helpful ideas. Maybe you’ve read some self-help books. Maybe you create a Vision Board or say affirmations to your mirror. 


But it just doesn’t seem to happen. 


Eventually you got discouraged because no matter how hard you tried, it seemed like every step forward was followed by two steps back.


That’s a big clue that you have underlying unconscious blocks that are interfering with your conscious desires.


When you repeatedly set a goal and can’t seem to reach it, there is very likely an unconscious block. 


Before becoming a coach, I never really understood how the “unconscious” mind works.


For some people, like me, understanding how the unconscious mind works is hard to get hold of, either because it doesn’t seem to add up, or it just wasn’t a subject of much interest before.


For me, what clarified the whole conscious vs unconscious mind concept, was when a friend asked me what I usually thought about on my drive home from work. 


“I think of all sorts of things,” I answered, “the family camping trip coming up, the trouble my sister’s having with her cats, what’s for dinner, and any number of things I can’t even remember.”


“Why?” I asked.


He responded, “If your mind was on all those things, who was taking care of the driving? The stop lights?  Using turn signals?”


In that moment I realized that, during my drive home, lost in my thoughts of other things, as a matter of course, I had unknowingly abandoned the drive home to my unconscious mind, who had assumed the chauffeuring duties.


In the training I’ve completed to become a coach, I’ve learned how significant a role the UM plays in our lives. 


I’ve learned that along with the day-to-day chauffeuring and other duties, the UM is in charge of 90% of what we do. In other words, we’re only consciously in charge 10% of the time. 


The prime directive of the UM is to protect us 

physically and emotionally.


For example, on a hike in the woods, when a bear jumps out of the brush, the UM has us racing in the other direction as fast as we can go. And guess what? We were off like a shot, without a conscious thought!


On a more serious note, when a soldier hears gunfire, without stopping to think, he scrambles under the closest cover he can find.


In both examples, the UM knew the bear and the gunfire were life threatening and took steps to see to their safety.


Emotionally, imagine a woman who has been seriously abused by her stepfather. As an adult, her UM wants to protect her from further pain. So, she consciously reframes the negativity of her past abuse.


She wants a healthy, long-term and loving relationship. As a reframe, she consciously told herself there are good men who can be trusted. 


This reframe carries her just so far before the unconscious trauma from her past, triggers her vulnerability and fear of abuse. 


Unconsciously she will find reasons, one after the other, to end each relationship. She is not consciously aware that her underlying fears are the true reason she backs out of the relationships. Her UM is protecting her.


Her conscious desire for a relationship is out of alignment with her unconscious mind’s need to protect her from the possibility of re-living the trauma she had suffered with her stepfather.


When there is conflict between the conscious and the unconscious, the unconscious will ALWAYS win. Yet, most of us aren’t even aware there is a conflict.


Remember the combat veteran, day-to-day, he’s able to deal with the recollection and negativity of his combat experience. He is consciously choosing to move forward and leave the past behind.


Nevertheless, at a BBQ, when a firecracker goes off, although he consciously knows he is no longer in a war zone, the veteran dove for safety under a nearby car. 


The soldier’s unconscious mind thinks he is in danger and finds immediate cover for him….without a conscious thought. His conscious and unconscious are not aligned.


The missing piece for the abused woman and the veteran is: the unconscious traumas, negative feelings, and limiting decisions from their pasts, are blocking them from living the life the desire. 


The underlying blocks need to be released.


As coaches, using Timeline Therapy™, we release the negative emotions or traumas surrounding critical past events. 


Then the unconscious and conscious are free to align and it’s much easier for clients to move forward and attain their goals. Life gets better!


In another example, imagine a woman whose goals are in the financial arena. She’s worked hard, got a good job, but can’t seem to get ahead. 


Sometimes she remembers her father telling her, “You’ll never make it, you’re not smart enough, you need to get a man to take care of you.” 


Even though she has consciously reframed her father’s negative message, it continues to sabotage her confidence on an unconscious level.


When you release the negative thoughts and emotions in your UM, you will automatically and literally, create new neural pathways in your brain and break old, ineffective patterns. 


This shift is where long-term success is activated. You break out of the rut of old neural pathways. Life is easier, and more fun when you’re in alignment!


This is the type of Shift we want for you.

Not just a conscious reframe.


At Gorilla Love Coaching, we work on the deeper level, so results last longer. This is why our program is different from most other coaching programs. 


The positive results we want for you are more attainable as you build alignment and trust between the Conscious Mind and Unconscious Mind. 


Recently I heard this analogy used: It’s like weeding a garden. When you simply cut the tops of the weeds, the garden looks better for awhile. That’s the effect of a conscious reframe. 


If you actually want to get rid of the weeds in the garden, you need to pull them out by the root. 


That’s what happens with Timeline Therapy™, we get down to the root cause and release it. 


Removing the “root” enables a lasting 

and REAL Mindset Shift.


So, are you ready for a REAL Mindset Shift? 


What type of “weeds” do you have in your garden?

In what ways have you been trying to move forward but seem to be blocked?


Maybe it’s time to get some help and remove the “roots” that are blocking you?


We believe you deserve to move forward and achieve your goals, especially in the area of relationships!


Happier relationships will make all the other areas

of your life better!


Studies have proven that when you are happier, you are healthier.

Happier people have greater financial success, as well.


You can start with a simple first step by attending our FREE webinar on Saturday, Sept 4th, titled: 

“Can You Say What You Mean without Being Mean?”


We’ll be talking about communications, a key for improving relationships. 


Click here to register: https://bit.ly/saywhatyoumeanwebinar


50% Complete

Subscribe to our Relationship Master newsletter

To get more great information about building a loving and supportive relationship.